It’s a lazy Saturday morning in the empty living room shared by Winston and Jamo. Clothes, beer cans and video games belonging to Jamo lie all over the expensive, neatly arranged furniture. Framed pictures have taken over the room. Most of them boast tall good-looking Jamo with his many rugby friends. Wimpy Winston’s few pictures contain him with his hot sexy girlfriend Joan and his hotter and sexier Lexus.
Through the open front door the loud moaning of Jamo and Joan making out on top of the Lexus drowns the sound of music coming from the neighbour’s.
Meanwhile Winston is just arriving home in a taxi and he’s not happy at all. First of all his meeting in Tanzania was cancelled when he was just about to board the plane twenty minutes ago. Then the not too bright taxi driver Paulo has ruined his expensive suitcase by putting it in the car boot, under the spare wheel! And then Paulo goes ahead to overcharge him by 2000 Ksh!
Back on top of the Lexus, Joan takes off her bra and throws it on top of the bonnet, giving Jamo a suggestive grin. Jamo can’t hold back his desires. He drags her, studded jeans and all, off the Lexus bonnet and takes her into the house to turn up the heat.
Winston is contemplating telling off Paulo and strangling him with the dirty spare wheel. However, reasoning gets the better of him so he doesn’t complain or strangle him with the spare wheel but instead pays Paulo what he asked for. Winston picks up his bag and heads home. His boss calls him and orders him to go to the office since he was going to work in Tanzania anyway. Winston agrees graciously as is expected.
Jamo and Joan are having such a good time in the living room that Jamo knocks over one of Winston’s pictures next to the couch. He shrugs his shoulders dismissively and continues kissing Winston’s woman.
Winston has finally reached his compound. He opens the gate with a sigh of relief when he sets eyes on his beloved Lexus. He goes to open the car door to put in his suitcase, and then he realizes something’s not right. He glances at the bonnet and realizes that something very bad has just happened there. As if to confirm this, his neighbour decides to turn up the volume of the music to scary loud levels.
‘WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED HERE?’ screams Winston.
His neighbour turns off the music to listen.
Stunned, Jamo and Joan jump off each other and off the couch. Jamo gets himself together calmly but Joan is frantically looking for the clothes she doesn’t have on.
Winston opens the front door, revealing his furious expression. Joan has her clothes on now but she now wishes she had armour on to shield her from Winston’s murderous glare.
‘Hey u! You’re back early! Is everything okay?’ is all Jamo can say.
Winston advances towards him with the question ‘What did you do out there?’
Jamo backs away from him, unsure of what to say or do. He decides to feign innocence. Winston charges at him, his anger fueled by Jamo’s denial. Jamo runs out into the car park to hide behind the Lexus. Winston confronts him again and he denies any wrongdoing.
Winston chases Jamo out onto the streets. Slow, scrawny Winston has no chance of catching up to athletic, fast Jamo. Winston is further slowed down by the fact that he hits his head on the compound gate, stunning himself. Winston then literally runs into Mozay, the neighborhood bully and suspected crime lord. Luckily Mozay lets him off with only a murderous look because the lollipop he’s eating makes him happy.
Jamo stops running to catch his breath. After tripping over his feet Winston finally reaches him, but Jamo dodges him with a classic rugby move and runs back towards home. He finds Winston’s pursuit more fun than life threatening at this point.
Winston, frustrated, charges after Jamo with new vigour. The neighbour’s vicious dog decides to chase Winston because he’s running and the dog hasn’t killed any one in a while. Winston runs for dear life. Jamo stops at the gate and doubles over in laughter, watching both of them. Winston reaches him right before the dog does.
Jamo reaches out his hand and the dog leaps at him, knocking him over. Winston covers his eyes but opens them when he realizes Jamo’s yells are of pleasure not pain. The dog licks Jamo playfully, then jumps off him and leaves both of them with a final growl at Winston.
Winston confronts Jamo again. ‘What did you do?’
‘I didn’t do anything,’ Jamo replies. With inhuman strength, Winston grabs Jamo and drags him into the compound.
‘Confess what you did, you’re going to pay’ growls Winston as he tightens his grip on Jamo’s neck. Under pressure Jamo admits his guilt.
‘You’ll have to pay 20 k’ orders Winston.
Jamo is shocked that Winston wants monetary compensation for sleeping with his girlfriend, but since he’s an accountant, Jamo doesn’t argue much. Besides, Winston is strangling the air out of his lungs on top of the car bonnet.
Winston wonders out aloud why Joan is home that day as he caresses the scratched bonnet of the Lexus. Seeing the scratches caused by the studs on Joan’s jeans, Jamo realizes that the chase was all about the scratches on the Lexus.
The lift lobby on 20th floor is deserted except for a sweeper busy at work and a curiously attractive, young Anthony, who is waiting next to the two lifts. Anthony is wearing an I.D badge that says ‘BSN camera operator’. A camera bag and tripod bag lie at his feet. To while away the time he plays with a wooden sign twirling it on its base as he watches the sweeper work his way further away from the lobby and into the office corridor.
Angela, an attractive reporter in her mid twenties bursts into the lobby from the corridor. The sweeper stops working to admire her and goes back to his work. She is wearing an I.D badge that says ‘TMI camera operator’. Anthony draws his attention away from the sweeper and observes her animated actions with a bit of a wistful look in his eyes.
Anthony stops playing with the wooden sign and puts it in front of the lift on the left. We see that the sign reads “DUE TO RENOVATIONS, THIS LIFT ONLY GOES DOWN TO 13TH FLOOR”.
Angela is carrying two large bags and talking loudly on her cell phone. The person at the other end of the line is her producer, threatening her that she’d better arrive at the political demonstrations that are happening on the streets outside before the rival news agency BNN does. She assures her producer that they won’t. Angela scowls when she notices Anthony, who is staring at her with a bemused expression on his face.
Angela sighs after the producer hangs up on her. She quickly masks her feelings when she notices that Anthony is staring at her.
Anthony tires to break the ice, but Angela ignores him. The lift bell on the right rings. The two look up at the lift sign on the right and back at each other.
Everything happens quickly. The right lift opens. Angela moves first. Anthony hesitates momentarily then follows her. Their rush is in vain because the full lift closes almost as soon as it opens.
Angela composes her self and looks back at Anthony grimly as she presses the ‘down’ lift button.
The lift bell on the left rings almost immediately. Angela gives Anthony a smug grin and stands in front of the left lift. Anthony stops her and tells her to read the sign in front of the lift. Her face falls when she reads the sign “DUE TO RENOVATIONS, THIS LIFT ONLY GOES DOWN TO 13TH FLOOR”.
The lift opens and closes shut, with Angela staring at the lift in despair as she fully comprehends the situation. The silence is violently interrupted by the sound of a man with a comical local accent shouting instructions. It’s Angela’s special cell phone ring tone for her producer. Angela panics. She advises Anthony that they should pick an order to avoid wasting time by fighting to get to the lift. Anthony is open to the suggestion. She suggests playing ‘paper rock scissors to pick an order and Anthony agrees.
They put down their mountains of equipment bags and pace towards each other in a sort of cowboy western style with their hands at their sides like loaded guns. They each stretch out their right hands in unison. Angela starts to count “ONE”- they start flipping the palm of their hands in a crazy frenzy “TWO”- It’s deathly quiet and all you can hear is the sound of the lift machinery working in the lift shaft. “THREE” they both draw their hands. Angela draws a rock, Anthony draws a rock.. It’s a tie.
Angela is not amused by the outcome. She clenches her teeth and starts the countdown for the second round. They both draw papers, tying again. The next two rounds have similar outcomes, ties.
It’s before the fifth round; by now Angela is losing her nerve. She scratches the back of her neck in frustration. Angela’s phone starts ringing again, and the sound of the special ring tone for her producer drowns out all other sounds as it increases in volume, the longer it rings. They play the 5th round and both concentrate so hard on flipping their hands as well as trying to ignore the ring tone that has reached deafening volume levels that a lift comes and goes without them noticing. It’s the final flip and they both draw rocks again and tie.
The phone stops ringing. They go for the next round of the game. Both draw scissors and Angela’s eyes widen in a panic.
It’s the seventh round. Angela’s phone starts to ring again but gets cut off. Angela inhales sharply and exhales in relief. They start the round. Everything is happening in slow motion now. Angela’s eyes are narrow slits. They flip their hands. Angela is millisecond ahead of Anthony in drawing her hand. She draws a rock. Anthony goes next and draws a paper. He wins the round.
Angela steps back in shock when she sees that Anthony has won. She buries her head in her hands. Anthony revels in his victory and presses the lift button, but is slightly unnerved by Angela’s dismay. He moves towards her, but is interrupted by the sound of her phone ringing again. He stops in his tracks. Angela’s head is still buried in her hands. She stays that way for a couple of seconds. Anthony watches her lift up her head and looks at him, with a look of vulnerability in her eyes.
She starts to tell him about how she feels she will never measure up to him. He’s the only person who constantly surpasses her. She cries that she will probably get demoted to junior camera person for not getting the story first.
Anthony is touched by her. He tells her not to worry, that she is just like him and will always be able to pick herself up after a fall.
She moves closer to him, in response to his kind words. She looks up into his eyes and they share a moment of intense connection. Anthony moves closer, mesmerized by what he sees in her eyes. He sees himself. Angela closes her eyes and lifts her neck, breaking the eye contact. The lift bell rings. Anthony leans in closing his eyes and Angela stretches her neck drawing closer to him.
Anthony waits for the kiss that doesn’t happen. He opens his eyes and sees Angela entering the right lift with her luggage.
Anthony stretches out his hand, yelling “Don’t!”
Angela smiles smugly at him as the doors of the lift shut him out.
Anthony is left all alone in the lift lobby. His angry expression is replaced with a look of amusement, as he shakes his head. The sweeper walks into the lobby from the corridor carrying a broom and pail. He clicks his tongue in anger when he sees the sign. “Who moved this? I placed it here (points towards the right lift) just 10 minutes ago!” He bangs down his broom in the pail, making a cluttering sound.
Anthony claims not to know how it got moved. He offers to help the man return the sign where it belongs. Anthony rolls the sign on its base placing it in front of the right lift.
The left lift opens and both men enter with their respective equipment.
The sweeper makes some comments about Angela’s good looks. He asks Anthony where she has gone.
Anthony replies, “She’s gone down”. Anthony presses the close the lift button and the doors close on his sly face.
THE END
Filed under: short stories | Tags: the grass may be greener there because there's more shit those sides.
It’s Valentines Day and there is love and excitement in the air. And we must not forget the presents and flowers circulating around St. John’s school.
Supuu is one of the prettiest girls in her high school. At least that’s what everyone says. She hangs out with the powerpuff girls, the hottest clique in the school. The gang leader is called Mary, and she’s far from being holy. Everyone hates her but everyone wants to be her.
It’s lunchtime and they are all seated at the centre of the cafeteria. Mary has the biggest stack of flowers piled next to her. Everyone else has a couple of roses but that’s it. Everyone except Supuu, who is sulking because she’s the only one in the group who currently has a steady boyfriend John, and she got nothing, zero, nothing at all from her boyfriend on Valentines Day.
The group gangs up on John. “ Why are you still with him? It’s lunchtime and he still hasn’t given you anything for valentines?” asks Mary.
“ I know, but he gave me a painting of me and him two days ago,” replies Supuu in defense of her man. “Look! “ she says pointing at the folded up painting in her satchel bag.
“You carry it around with you?” asks Mary.
“ He told me to,” replies Supuu.
“ You listen too much to him. And anyway it doesn’t count” counters Liz, Mary’s second in command. “He does art. It’s expected for him to give you such things. But valentines is different.”
A guy called Franco, who is carrying a big box, interrupts them. “I have a gift for Supuu”
The girls all crowd around the box, oohing and aahing. A card is attached and it reads ‘ from a secret admirer.’ David, the richest, hottest guy walks past and smiles at Supuu. Mary winks at Supuu knowingly. “ I told you David likes you.”
Supuu opens the box; it has a bunch of beautiful, long stemmed, deep red roses. She lifts them and smells them. Under the roses is a beautiful gold chain. She proudly wears it around her neck and the other girls are green with envy.
“ Are you sure it’s real” Mary says in a syrupy voice.
Supuu looks worried.
Mary quickly says, “ I’m sure it is gold plated at the least. You have a secret admirer.”
David laughs loudly behind them, where he is seated with his friends, including Franco. His gold chain glints in the sun as he throws back his head in laughter. He catches Supuu’s eye and blows a kiss in her direction.
All the girls giggle happily and turn to Supuu. She fingers the chain with a sad smile on her face.
Mary interrupts her reverie. “ Now this is the kid of guy you should go out with. Not john who just gives you paintings. Has he even called you yet?”
“He is so yesterday’s news!”
“ Cheap guy!”
“Dump John”
“ David is the one!”
“And give him back his painting. Cheap guy! Does he think that’s enough for a girl like you?”
Supuu caves in. She marches to the art room and finds John crouched over a painting in the middle of the room.
She interrupts his trance by saying his name. He looks up dreamily. He was painting Supuu, his muse, his love. “ I was expecting you” John says.
“Well I have something to say to you. It’s over” the words tumble out of Supuu’s pretty lips.
John looks crushed.
She throws the painting down on the floor. John is still on his knees. He looks at it wordlessly and looks up at her. She is fingering the gold necklace. He stares up at it.” That’s a nice chain”
“ It’s from my secret admirer. See he knows what I want and we are not even going out. Even kina Mary agree that he. They agree”
John looks down at the painting and back up at Supuu. She is no longer as beautiful as he thought she was. The spell is broken.
He stands up holding the painting. “ You listen too much to what other people see. Maybe you should start using your own eyes more. Keep the painting. I don’t want it.”
Supuu looks at him walk off. It didn’t quite go the way she expected it to. She looks at the painting again and really sees it for the first time.
The Supuu in the painting is wearing a gold chain exactly like the one she has on.
And gold earrings, and a gold bracelet.
At the bottom are inscribed the words. ‘ This painting is everything I want to give to you and more”
Franco walks in carrying another huge present. “ Sorry, I couldn’t find Supuu…”
“ It’s okay, I changed my mind about the other presents” John says. He turns to Supuu “ Happy valentines”
Supuu finally gets it.
THE END.
When I was younger, my family loved going on trips together, visiting relatives or going for nyama choma at Sports view hotel or Villa Park. I preferred the nyama choma trips, though sometimes the visits to the relatives were sometimes interesting when they had kids our age. One day my family went to visit my uncle at his old colonial home situated in the leafy tea town of Kiambu, which is on the outskirts of Nairobi, where we live. My sister and I were seven and ten years old back then and very adventurous; nothing scared us. (Anyone who knows me know will wonder how I could ever have been fearless! I’m still very adventurous, but even butterflies scare me! I’m a walking paradox.) So when my parents were downstairs talking to my aunt and uncle, we sneaked upstairs to explore the house, which had darkly lit, long corridors with creaky wooden floorboards.
We opened a door, thinking it was a cupboard, hoping to find treasures from the colonial past,; things like the body parts of old slaves, maybe whips, things that colonialists like to hang on to. What we saw instead was more exciting and less perverse. We saw narrow stairs leading upwards. A shaft of light, presumably coming from a window, or a hole in the roof, broke the darkness.
My baby sister looked up at me questioningly, “Twende?” I nodded yes.
Being the oldest, I went first. We tip toed, not wanting to disturb anything or anyone.
Finally reaching the top of the stairs, after an agonizingly long 30 seconds, we stopped and stared in awe, at a crowded, dimly lit attic full of old unused knick knacks and broken furniture. Light was seeping in through cracks in the roof.
We stood transfixed; our trance was cut short by the sound of a loud noise in the far corner of the room. We looked at each other. “It’s just a rat,” I assured my sister.
We heard some more movement in the other corner of the attic and turned our heads in that direction. The noise stopped. “Didn’t that sound like someone waking up,” asked my sister.
“Well I…” I stopped midway, because my sister was staring at the other corner of the attic with a look of frozen horror on her face. I turned to see what was scaring her so. A figure was walking slowly towards us!
I looked back at my sister; we had the same instinct, to run away from the loud noise, as would most normal people. We tumbled down the stairs, pulling at each other as we made our way towards freedom!
Two seconds later but not too late, we reached the bottom of the stairs and quickly shut the cupboard door behind us.
“What was that?”, my sister cried out, holding onto my arm tightly.
I had no answer. Her grip was tight and her nails was cutting into my skin, but it was comforting knowing that she was next to me, with that thing or things (gasp) on the other side of the door.
“Mumbi, Koi, where are you?”
That was our mother. We dashed downstairs quickly, running away from whatever was in that old, dark attic.
“What were you doing?” my nosy mother asked.
“Nothing, nothing, nothing….just looking around.” I quickly replied.
“Ah! Do you want to see the rest of the house, there’s an old…” started my uncle.
my sister and I looked at each other with horrified expressions.
“It’s OK, you don’t have to, anyway we need to leave now,” my father came to our rescue. I think he missed the noise of the city, Nairobi.
We kissed our uncle goodbye and ran back into the car. That was the first and last time that we ever entered that house, and to this day we don’t know whether it really happened or whether it was the result of an overactive imagination. Either way, I’m not going back into that house, because I turned out to be a bit of a coward in my later years, so no thank you!
